30 Unwritten Letters!

                                           And I write letters to you that you 'll never see!
                                                  
                                                                      ...

Dear Stefan, I still think of you.

Dear Caleb, I was kid who was filled with jealously and so were you.

Dear Philip, You were my best friend. And now I don't even know you.

Stewart! The scars you've left are long erased. But remember I was not even 10 back then.

Dear Steve and Marcus, please forgive me! I meant to skip grades not our friendship.

Dear Stefan, I still think of you.

Dear Nate, I'm sorry. You were so sweet to me but i was fighting with my insecurities.

Dear Brian, who still keeps all my letters and gifts. Please burn them. For I have burned your memories too.

Dear Sam, I'm sorry that you feel I screwed up your brother.

Dear Sam's brother Stan, I'm not really sorry. I'm just sorry your borther found out.

Dear Sam.... I never had feelings for you. Don't pretend,  I know you didn’t feel it too.

Dear Stefan, I still think of you.

Dear Ruth,  even if I were straight I wouldn't date you.

Dear Rebecca, I'm sorry I left you standing alone in the middle of the street.

Dear Polly, I was alone and drunk. And I thought you were too.

Dear Kate, I'm sorry you're boyfriend left you. But he never did love you.

Dear Renae, I thought I loved you.

Dear Stefan, I still think of you.

Dear Stranger whose name I forgot I'm sorry I ditched you in the middle of the first date. But I was looking for love not for sex.

Dear BRIAN.  BURN THOSE DAMN LETTERS ALREADY. I was a hopeless romantic back in school.

Dear Jack. You were my biggest mistake.

Dear Rob. I was your biggest mistake.

Dear Ross, I'm sorry. But you were married and I was way too young for you.

Dear Spencer. I hope you don't end up like Ross.

Adam And Shane... Karma's a bitch. Remember.

Dear Stefan, I still think of you.

Dearest Brendan. You were the sweetest of all but I'm sorry you left her for me but i couldn't leave him for you.

Dear Raymond, learn to love yourself.

Dear Derek, you were just another doctor not my McDreamy. And I'm truely sorry.

Dear Matthew who has the most beautiful pair of eyes I've ever seen. I'm sorry I stalked you. If I were you, I'd try to forget me too.

Dear Phoenix, Keep telling "that" to yourself.

Dear Kevin,  I hope your soul rests in peace.

Dear Stefan...I Still love you!

                                                                    ...

Maybe Love Takes Time...

To all the hopeless romantics like myself...
                                                     
                                                                  ...
  
Maybe love is thinking about me while I'm writing this. Maybe love doesn't even know that I exist. Maybe our paths have already crossed and I have failed to recognise love. Maybe love is the distance future waiting for me. Or maybe love is on date with someone else, oblivious to me. I don't know...

The cliché question that every hopeless romantic like me asks to oneself is "Do I believe in love at first sight?" 

I cannot answer on behalf of others but for me... Probably Not! But i do believe in the feeling that comes along when I see that someone. That "heart pounding in my throat" kind of feeling that happens when i see love. But you see, there's a reason I say I do not believe in love at first sight. It's because I believe love takes time...

But first, what is love?
Maybe love is the invisible hand that tickles my belly and paints my cheeks red. Or maybe that's not love at all. Maybe it's just attraction, the strong kind. Because you just love the idea of being in love with them. Let's face it, you do not know anything about them besides the fact that they are hot. LOVE is too strong to describe what you're feeling right now.

And slowly love becomes a part of your life. Love keeps you awake all night. Love keeps you hanging dearly to your cellphone and your facebook. To describe in simpler way, love wrecks your sleep and makes you suffer from anxiety. But it doesn't matter because you're happy and that is all that counts.

So time passes... and with each passing day you get hold of your disorders. And one day you wake up without those insecurities that makes you cling to your phone and your facebook. When you spend more time with them,  you get to know more about them and you soon discover a part of them you never realise that they had. Maybe some good surprises. Or maybe some major flaw. Slowly but precisely you know love for who love is...

And then one day you wake up and realise that you love the person for who they are with all those imperfections  because you realise their  imperfections makes them who they are.

And then, after a longer while you realise that you love them. LIKE REALLY LOVE THEM not just "baby love" them. And the anxiety is gone. But a new feeling of content is there to take it's place. (But those invisible hands still tickles your belly.)

You don't know how and when these feelings grew this strong. You just know it did. Like it was yesterday when love arrived but it feels like you have known them your whole life. That between now and then something has changed. That you have changed. And you love yourself and love him/her for making you love yourself.

And so I realise maybe LOVE doesn't happen overnight. That LOVE takes time to build up through all those conversation and time spent together. Just like how strong foundation is required to build a strong house. I realized LOVE, it takes time... and that we should let it.

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